Not a day goes by that my changito tells me that. Most of the time he's a normal 5 year old, playing with cars watching cartoons. Now that he's on summer vacation he's hopefully going to be doing all kinds of fun stuff with his Auntie, who by the way is my life saver. He can still laugh out loud but there is something in this eyes that was not there before. This look of confusion mixed with sadness, it intensifies when call night comes and he gets to talk to Jose. You can see the happiness and confusion on his face when he hears Joses voice.
I can't imagine the mixture of emotions he must be going through, he's so small. I mean it's tough on me, I cry all the time, I dream about my Gordo being here my emotions are totally up and down. One day I'm on the verge of a nervous break down, I'm planning my Mexico survival strategy on an other and then I'm thinking fuck that he's gonna be home!
What about Cairo? He's not old enough to know the details of why his papi can't come home. All he knows is that his dad didn't come home one day. All he knows is that his dad made a mistake and is now in a "jail house". He's 5 and his dad, his best friend, the guy that played carritos with him and took him to the park every day possible, his "comaprre" (compadre) just fell off the face of the earth. He get's to hear his voice a couple times a week and every now and then gets a letter in the mail telling him how much he is missed and loved. All he hears is promises of being reunited with his comparre.
The truth of the matter is that I feel guilty. I reassure him and tell him that one day papi will come home and we'll be together again. The thing is that is not necessarily the truth. There is a possibility that his papi will never come back. What then? I know it's too soon to even think that way but it's a possibility. What will happen to Cairo if his papi doesn't ever come home?
I can't imagine the mixture of emotions he must be going through, he's so small. I mean it's tough on me, I cry all the time, I dream about my Gordo being here my emotions are totally up and down. One day I'm on the verge of a nervous break down, I'm planning my Mexico survival strategy on an other and then I'm thinking fuck that he's gonna be home!
What about Cairo? He's not old enough to know the details of why his papi can't come home. All he knows is that his dad didn't come home one day. All he knows is that his dad made a mistake and is now in a "jail house". He's 5 and his dad, his best friend, the guy that played carritos with him and took him to the park every day possible, his "comaprre" (compadre) just fell off the face of the earth. He get's to hear his voice a couple times a week and every now and then gets a letter in the mail telling him how much he is missed and loved. All he hears is promises of being reunited with his comparre.
The truth of the matter is that I feel guilty. I reassure him and tell him that one day papi will come home and we'll be together again. The thing is that is not necessarily the truth. There is a possibility that his papi will never come back. What then? I know it's too soon to even think that way but it's a possibility. What will happen to Cairo if his papi doesn't ever come home?
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