Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Tic-toc our time is almost up

In September my husband will be in court. I don't know exactly what is going to happen but I've been getting really anxious about it. I feel like the clock is counting down (tic-toc, tic-toc) and we will know what direction the judge will set our lives on.

It sucks, Jose has been home for almost a year and a half and most of our family and friends our immigration woes are over. They are actually surprised that after all we went through the last few years the government still wants to deport my husband. It comes to show how most people don't know how our immigration laws work. Some actually thought he was now on the path to legal residency and were very surprised to find out he is not.

I'm feeling nervous a scared. I look back on this last year and I don't know how Cairo and I would have survived without Jose being home. The fact that he has been working has helped tremendously financially. Not to mention his presence alone has helped so much with taking care of Cairo. Jose is my support system, he's my family and life without him is just back breakingly difficult.

I read on immigration news as much as I can and sometimes I get excited thinking finally we will have CIR and hopefully it will help my family. Then I read about how those who would benefit from the proposed laws are people without criminal history and that's when I realize there aren't any politicians out there who are looking out for my family. How is "criminal history" defined? Where is the line drawn? Is someone who has committed a none violent crime a "criminal"? What if the case is vacated? Does it matter how it was vacated? Why is it that these politicians, even those in favor of CIR insist of making these distinctions?

My husband is no angel and he has made mistakes but he is a good man and a good father. He does the best he can to do right by his son and myself. He is not the same person from 5 years ago, or 10 years ago or 15 years ago. None of us are, we grow, we learn, we evolve. Why does that not account for anything? Why can't they see the person who may have made a mistake years ago is not the same person who is fighting to stay with their family now?

I'm scared that if and when CIR is passed, we will fall through the loop holes. I'm scared that our family will be split up again. I'm scared of how that will not only affect me but how that will affect my son.